November 13, 2011 Fact is, I feel
There is a saying…That you don’t know what you’ve got untill it’s gone. Over the last few months as my life became progressively better I begin to see only what I did not have and think about things I have not done. Instead of being grateful I was regretful. Living with a disease that talks to me in my own voice telling me how inadequate and inferior I will always be.
Learning and receiving evidence that the void that I have can’t be filled by external things. Sit with those feelings of indifference. In a treatment facility upstate New York Counselor Connie said to me…
Feelings are not fact. But it is a fact that I feel. -Connie
Riding in the back seat on i295 en route to my mother’s home, this is something that I realized. “My story does not have to be a tragic one” Anna Nicole, Lindsey Lohan, Jimmie Hendrix, River Phoenix…
Some of the stuff that I’ve been through would have broken most. Sniffing cocaine uptown, being drugged and raped as a child and adult. Being homeless in the city that never sleep. Styling for a major record company and walking away, being diagnosed with HIV, hustling people and my self, dropping out of college and having Design school steal my portfolio. High profile, lonesome insanity.
Hell is only known to the people who are in it.- Ginyar
Tags: addiction, Anna Nicole, fashion, HIV, Jimmie Hendrix, Life, Lindsey Lohan, Men's fashion, new york, River Phoenix
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